Intentionally corny and wholesome jokes, often pun-based.
I would tell you a joke about vegetables, but it's corny.
Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because they have their own scales.
Did you hear about the hungry clock? It went back four seconds.
I'm friends with a vegan baker. But I think she's just in it for the dough.
I told my wife she should do toe touches to stay in shape. She looked down on that idea.
I told my wife she should do sit-ups to stay in shape. She replied, 'Well, where else would I do them?'
I told my wife she should do push-ups to stay in shape. She said she's already pushed her luck.
I told my wife she should do squats to stay in shape. She said, 'I squat every time I sit down.'
I told my wife she should do yoga to stay in shape. She said, 'Namaste in bed.'
What did one plate say to another? Tonight, dinner's on me!
Why shouldn't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.
Why are calendars good at solving math problems? They have lots of dates!
What kind of music do planets listen to? Nep-tunes!
How do you organize a outer space party? You planet!
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana? Slip-on!
Why are frogs so happy? Because they eat whatever bugs them!
People always say to follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.
Why did the coffee report a crime? It got mugged.
Why do chicken coops have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans.
I'm trying to write a joke about time travel, but you guys didn't like it.
Where do animals go when their tails fall off? The retail store.