Why are spiders good at computer programming? They are excellent web developers.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The P is silent.

I've got a great joke about construction, but I'm still working on it.

I had a job tying sausages together, but I couldn't make ends meet.

What do you give a sick lemon? Lemon aid.

I'm tired of negative people. Down with that sort of thing!

I would tell you a joke about lemons, but they're too a-peeling.

A steak pun is a rare medium well done.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind, it's tearable.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl using the bathroom? Because the P is silent.

I have a joke about chemistry, but I'm afraid it wouldn't get a reaction.

What did the scarecrow say when the other scarecrow asked for advice? You need to start using your head!

Why was the math book unhappy with its look? It felt radical!

Why was the baby strawberry crying? Because its mom was in a jam!

Why did the leopard go to the hospital? It had too many spots!

What did one ghost say to the other ghost? Do you believe in people too?

What do you call a fish wearing a crown? Salmon royalty!

Why couldn't the bicycle make it up the hill? It was two tired!

What did the belt say after a disappointing day? I've hit rock bottom!

Why don't scientist trust atoms anymore? Because they make up everything!

Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!