I took a photo of a field of wheat. It was grainy.

What's Harry Potter's favourite way of getting around? Walking...J.K. Rolling.

Hey do you know where the king keeps his armies? In his sleevies.

Why did the poet bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house.

What do you call a pony with a cough? A little horse.

I tried to organize a space-themed party but none of the guests showed up - it was too far out.

I would tell you a joke about a pencil, but it's pointless.

Why do monsters always avoid eating ghosts? They're a bit transparent.

Have you heard the joke about the roof? Never mind, it's over your head.

Have you heard about corduroy pillows? They're making headlines.

Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion? There was debris everywhere!

Why did the math equation look sad? It had too many problems.

Did you hear about the corduroy pillow? It's making headlines.

Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.

Did you hear about the kidnapping at the zoo? It's fine now, they woke up the giraffe.

I'm really good at telling bad jokes. It's a talent I've honed to a fine art.

I would tell you a joke about a vacuum, but it sucks.

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mineshaft? A flat minor.

Why was there lightning over the computer? Someone forgot to put it on iCloud.

What's a queen's favorite kind of precipitation? Reign!

What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.